What’s Up?

I love glancing through the pages of my Bible and seeing the blue ink…passages underlined because they astound me and challenge me, promises I can trust, recorded insight into the original meaning of words, etc.

But there was a time, my Bible was pristine, without a single mark on a single page. Just a lot of dust on the cover.

The change in both me and my Bible began because I casually mentioned eternity to a friend whom I thought believed the same things I believe. I no longer make such assumptions. She informed me she was an atheist. She said she did not believe there was a God. She believed that, upon our death, we would all turn to dust. Nothing more!

I recited several things I learned through years of sitting in church pews but I had no clue as to where those truths could be found in the Bible.

My faith was challenged. Why did I believe what I believed? Was my faith real? Since my spirit seemed to shout aloud the existence of a good God, I wrestled with questions like ‘Who is He’ and ‘Where is He’. I could recall the day that, as a teenager, I professed Jesus as Lord…but had there been any spiritual growth? Was I living as if I truly believed He was Lord?

So…I signed up for my first Bible study. I wanted answers for my friend (even though she wasn’t asking any questions) but I think my spirit also wanted answers.

I found a safe place to ask questions. I learned the value of  studying the Bible in its historical and cultural setting. I learned to ask questions like “Why was this written? What can this reveal to me about God’s character? How am I supposed to interact with His Word in truth?”

But the study turned into a romance as I began to fall in love with Jesus. Obsessively so! The more I learned about Him and His character, the more I wanted to know. I read, I studied. And then I read more. And I prayed…I prayed that I would understand. I prayed that it would all make sense. I prayed that God would teach me His ways.

That is when I began to identify with the woman at the well (John 4:4-42). I met Jesus while steeped in sin. I quickly realized that He knew me better that I knew myself and that, regardless of my past and regardless of my present day choices, He still wanted to spend time with me. No condemnation!

We had many spiritual discussions (through His Word). I asked a lot of questions. Many times I received answers. And for some questions, I’m still waiting for answers. Jesus revealed Himself as my Messiah and I recognized my desperate need for Him. And just as the Samaritan woman became a woman who was compelled to tell others of her divine encounter, I too can’t seem to keep quiet about Him and His amazing love.

The relationship I had with God grew exponentially when I purchased a new Bible…clean, crisp white pages…and began reading from the beginning, with a new agenda. I began searching for God and His character. Not me and how I fit into His story. Not what He is seeking in me. Just Him!!! And so the blue marks in my Bible have been growing. And so has my awe of Him.

That is why this devotional was written. I want to share what I learned as I sat at the feet of the Teacher. I want to reveal the truths that softened and changed my heart. I want to testify to God’s enduring, faithful love for all of us. And I’m not afraid to share my unanswered questions.

I promise to be real and vulnerable. I don’t intend to defend His truth. He can do that Himself. I don’t intend to be a professional commentary (I’m not that smart), although there are things I’ve learned about context from commentaries written by brilliant minds. I just intend to reveal the relationship I have with God through His written Word.

Join me as I step into the gospel of John. I think He has riches in store for all of us.